
Usually we want to blame the other person and put the focus on them, but consider that we actually teach people how to treat us and if somebody is taking advantage of you, then somehow you have made them feel that it’s okay to do that.
I know this can be uncomfortable to hear. But I also know it’s true, because I used to be a person that people took advantage of all the time. Now I can totally see how I created that. I was too nice. I went out of my way to help people, which isn’t a bad thing, except when you do it at your own expense, which I did (frequently).
For example – I used to work for a group of engineers and when they received a request for a proposal (RFP) they would put the proposal together and give it to me to create a presentation for them to give with the proposal. They would receive the RFPs which would then sit on their desk for weeks. Finally, they would put together the proposal and give it to me the day before they were due to give the presentation. That meant that I had to frequently work through the night in order to have the presentation ready for the next day. Insane, right?
I used to get very upset about it, but I never said anything to them. I just used to get on with it and let the resentment build – so I was teaching them that it was okay to treat me that way. That would absolutely not happen today.
If you’re feeling that someone is taking advantage of your good nature and it doesn’t feel good to you, check in with yourself to see how you have created this, and try this affirmation:
I release the need to allow people to disrespect or take advantage of me. I set clear boundaries and claim my power with love.