When it’s only temporary… What happens when you do something that’s supposed to be temporary, but you find you’re still there several years later?

I received a question from someone last week that reminded me of this, so I thought I’d make it the focus of this week’s tip. I’ve had this experience and I know many others have too.

For example, I’ve worked with people who moved into an apartment or home that was supposed to be temporary – that was 5 or 6 years ago. Also with people who took a job that they didn’t particularly want and don’t love, because they didn’t plan on being there very long. One person I know was in this situation for over 10 years.

What can you do when you really want to move on but you feel trapped?

From my experience people stay stuck where they are because they are resisting it. The key is to accept and make the most of where you are, while at the same time putting some energy towards where you want to be.

When someone moves into an apartment thinking it’s only going to be for about a year, usually they put things in storage, leave things in boxes, and don’t fully move into their space because it’s only supposed to be temporary.

Whenever I worked with someone in this position I encouraged them to unpack the boxes, hang pictures on the walls, and make it feel like home. This will actually help you move on faster than if you leave everything packed. It may seem counter-intuitive – why would you unpack everything if you don’t plan on being there long? But keeping everything packed keeps you in a holding pattern. You are not embracing where you are. You are resisting it and that can keep you stuck.

It’s the same in any other situation. If you have the attitude that you don’t want to be there and only want to move on to something else it’s likely you’ll be there longer than you planned. Instead, do your best to embrace the position and feel as good as you can there. You can still be thinking about, and putting energy into finding the thing that you REALLY want to do, but the energy behind it will be more of: “I accept that this is where I am now and I do my best to embrace it as I also put energy towards what I really want,” instead of “I don’t want to be here, I don’t like it, I want to move on as quickly as possible.”

The energy of acceptance and appreciation will move you forward faster than the energy of resistance and resentment.

Action Step: If there is a situation you want to move out of, but are finding it difficult think about how you could make the most of it and appreciate it now, while still putting some energy towards what you want. Think of it in the same way as “unpacking the boxes” and allowing yourself to feel good about where you are SO THAT you can move on to where you want to be.

Let this Unstoppable Affirmation support you on your journey:

I allow myself to feel good about where I am, and know that the better I feel, the more progress I will make. The better I feel, the better it gets.

Be Unstoppable!

Linda

 Connecting with your home… So many people responded telling me they were interested in learning about the energy of their home with the Feng Shui Success course, so I thought you might enjoy some energy tips on this topic.

When I worked as a Feng Shui practitioner, the first thing I had to do on a consultation was to connect with the client’s home to see what the energy of the home was showing me about them.

My main goal was to help clients understand their home on a different level – and to show them how to make energy changes that would make a difference.

The starting point was always to ask them a few questions that would tell me (and them) more about the house and how it was supporting them (or not).

Here is one question for you to think about regarding your own home:

• What do you know about the history of your home? Things like: who lived there before? Why did they leave? What condition did they leave the home in? What is the energy of your neighbors and the neighborhood like? If your home is new, what is the history of the land it’s built on?

This question helps you understand and connect with your home on a deeper level and often provides valuable and helpful information. For example, it’s possible to come across a home where everyone who has lived there experienced financial problems, or health issues or suffered a relationship breakup. Certain features in homes can energetically create these problems for the people who live there. So you would want to know how to correct that.

Action Step: If you would like to understand the energy of your home and how it’s affecting you, begin by asking yourself this question and see what you can learn from the answers. If you have lived in your home for many years, it may not be as relevant, but it's still a good question to think about.

“We shape our dwellings, and afterwards our dwellings shape us.” – Sir Winston Churchill

Be Unstoppable

Linda

P.S. CLICK HERE to learn more about the Feng Shui Success Program where you will learn everything you need to know about your home, and how to create a healthy, balanced, and supportive environment.

The need for connection… This topic has been on my mind lately because many people I talk to share that they experience difficulty finding people they can connect with in a meaningful way. It’s also often a real challenge for those who are highly sensitive, and introverts in particular.

I came across an article recently from Mindwise that sums up the need for connection very well:

“Human beings are inherently social creatures. As far back as we can trace, humans have traveled, hunted, and thrived in social groups and for good reason. Humans who were separated from their tribe often suffered severe consequences. Social groups provide us with an important part of our identity, and more than that, they teach us a set of skills that help us to live our lives. Feeling socially connected, especially in an increasingly isolated world, is more important than ever. The benefits of social connectedness shouldn’t be overlooked.”

One of the things I like about technology and the internet is that it enables us to connect with people outside our immediate geographical area and with people we don’t necessarily know. For example, I can connect with you by sending out these weekly tips. But it also means that connections may be superficial and it can be difficult to get to know people well.

Action Step: Acknowledge your connections with the people around you. Make sure you surround yourself with people who value and support you.

Let this quote from Brené Brown support you on your journey.

“I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.” – Brené Brown

Be Unstoppable!

Linda

P.S. If you'd like to connect with me for a complimentary Breakthrough Session via Zoom, contact me and let me know your country/time zone. I'll send some days/times for you to choose from for our session.

When you feel overwhelmed… it’s so easy to feel powerless and it’s difficult to see a way out.

You can have so many things on your mind that you feel like one more thing will tip you over the edge.

It’s a horrible feeling, and it’s one that can creep up on you.

When this happens you might think you need to do things like: learn how to manage your time more effectively, prioritize things more efficiently or just get more done. These are all external solutions and they don’t always work.

Of course, there are effective stress management and mindfulness techniques that can help you, and they are worth exploring. But if you’re looking for more permanent solutions, here are some things to consider.

I have found that at times like this the best things to do often seem like the hardest things to do, but in my experience they are the most effective. These are not typically things that you will hear anyone talk about:

1. First, you’ll want to know why you’re feeling overwhelmed. Is it because you have too much to do? Or because you feel stuck with something and don’t know what to do to change it, because nothing you have tried seems to work.
   
   
2. If you have too much to do, the first step is to identify what’s most important to you and make the decision that you will let go of what doesn’t serve you.
   
   
3. For those who are highly sensitive, it’s easy to become hooked in to the energy of other people – those who are around you, and also collective energy. This makes it really difficult to change anything because what you’re trying to change is not yours. The harder you try to change it, the more stuck you will feel. It’s important to recognize this and make the decision to disconnect from any of this energy that is not serving you.
   
   
4. Embrace the concept of letting go. It’s one of the most powerful things you can do. Let go of the need to be always busy. Let go of the need to be always ‘doing.’ Let go of needing to know the answers. Let go of trying to figure everything out. Let go of feeling responsible for everyone.  I know this is one of the hardest things to do, but when you are able to do it, you’ll be amazed at how much better you feel, and how you open yourself up to creative solutions and much better things.
   

Put more focus on how you feel, rather than what you need to accomplish. The interesting thing is that when you do this, you will actually accomplish more.

Action Step: Consider at least one of the above suggestions and focus on that. Notice what changes for you.

Let this Unstoppable Affirmation support you on your journey:

I now choose to release all feelings of overwhelm and allow time for self-care. I am calm and centered in all situations.

Be Unstoppable!

Linda

P.S. By popular request I’m offering the Feng Shui Success Program again. If you’d like to learn more about the energy in your environment and how it affects you, CLICK HERE. Changing the energy in your environment can certainly help you when you feel overwhelmed.

Are you listening? Or perhaps the better question might be – which voice are you listening to?

Are you listening to the inner voice that tells you how much you have in your life to appreciate and guides you to do what’s best for you? Or are you listening to the inner voice that tells you you’re not good enough and you should be doing more? Or the one that tells you of all the bad things that might happen if you reach for too much success?

Or perhaps you’re listening to people around you who tell you what you should or shouldn’t be doing. Or those who want you to see things only from their perspective and be just like them. Or those who want to sell you the solution to all your problems.

You have probably experienced that inner voice that guides you and points you in the right direction. You know that when you listen to it things tend to work out well, and when you don’t – well, things don’t work out so well.

It’s easy for that inner guiding voice (the one that’s good for you) to be drowned out by all the other voices. You may feel you’ve lost your connection to it because there are so many other things competing for your attention. How do you re-connect with it?

I think we have to be constantly aware of staying connected to ourselves. To notice when our REAL voice is being drowned out and to be willing to let go and disconnect form all those other voices and messages. It takes practice – because those other voices can be very persistent and insistent.

Action Step: Choose at least one method that helps you slow down and connect with YOUR supportive inner voice, that gives you time to listen to it and do it daily. Here are some ideas:

• Journaling
  
• Meditation
• Walking (without headphones)
• Yoga, Tai Chi or something similar
• Quiet time (especially in nature)
  

Let this Unstoppable Affirmation support you on your journey:

I have faith in my inner voice and I pay attention to it daily.

Does this resonate with you? How do you make sure you listen to your supportive inner voice? Submit a comment and tell me about it.

Be Unstoppable!

Linda

Just because you can… How often do you find yourself doing things you don’t really want to be doing but you said yes to it because you CAN do it? You may find yourself in a situation that’s difficult to leave because you’ll feel guilty if you do.

I’ve done that many times. So many in fact that one of my favorite messages now is “just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.” I say this to myself and I recommend it to my clients.

You are probably capable of doing many things. Some of them you enjoy, and some of them you might not enjoy. Sometimes you may be asked to do something which you can do, perhaps even easily. It may even sound exciting at first, but if you really think about it, it’s not something that you WANT to do. But you say yes anyway, just because you can do it and because someone asked you or you were presented with the opportunity.

I work with so many people who are feeling overwhelmed with all the things they’ve taken on. We seem to have been conditioned to believe that we should say yes to anything that we have the ability to do. But that road leads to stress, overwhelm and extreme frustration as you feel trapped in situations that are difficult to leave.

If you’re highly sensitive or an empath, it can be particularly difficult because you overthink the situation. I call this mental gymnastics, as you think about every possible outcome, everyone’s feelings, possible conversations, etc. The way through this is to focus on how you FEEL about what you’re considering. Would committing to doing this feel joyful? Would it feel good to do? Is it something you want to have in your experience?

Action Step: Next time an opportunity comes your way or you’re asked to do something, give yourself time to think about it. Check in with yourself to see if it’s something you really WANT to invest your time and energy into.

Let this Unstoppable Affirmation support you on your journey:

“Just because I can do something, it doesn’t mean I should. I am free to choose what’s right for me.”

Does this resonate with you? Do you have a story to share? Tell me about it in the comments, or send me an email directly. I always love to hear from you.

Be Unstoppable!

Linda

When you feel invisible… Have you ever felt that you’re invisible? Perhaps people don’t listen to you, talk over you, or seem not to hear you when you talk. Or
perhaps they seem to ignore you – talking to others around you, but not to you.

I have experienced this many times and so have many other highly sensitive and introverted people. Most of the time I didn’t think it was a problem. In fact, when I was younger I think I perfected the art of being invisible. I wanted to be invisible because I never liked to be the center of attention and I liked being in the background.

But there are times it’s not a good thing to be invisible. When you have a business, for example, you certainly want your customers to notice you. And there are times when it is downright annoying – being overlooked for promotion for example, or having someone else take the credit for work that you have done.

If you would like to stop feeling like you’re invisible, here are some things to consider:

• First you have to feel very comfortable with yourself. You may choose to be in the background because you’re very different from the majority of others and being noticed makes you feel uncomfortable. The more you own who you are, accept and embrace your differences, the less you’ll be ignored.
  
  
• Second, you must be willing to be more visible. How is it serving you to be ignored? If it’s not serving you, then instead of feeling angry about it, make the decision to change it.
  
  
• Being visible doesn’t mean you have to be someone you’re not. For example, introverts often think that if they want to be seen and heard they have to become loud and extroverted – which goes against their nature. It’s not true. You can be assertive, speak up when you want or need to, and yet still honor your true nature.
  
  
• Often we don’t want to be seen because of the belief that somehow we’re not good enough. If you feel this way, it’s time to challenge that belief.

You can be quiet and still powerful. You can be gentle and also assertive. You don’t have to give up who you are. You have a great deal to offer – and nobody can benefit from what you have to offer if you are invisible.

Action Step: Notice where and when you might feel that you’re being ignored, or when you want to be ignored. Make the decision today that you are ready to be seen and heard and know that who you are is good enough in every way.

Let this Unstoppable Affirmation support you on your journey:

I release the need or desire to be invisible. I now claim my power and my authority with love and am willing to allow myself to be seen and heard.

Be Unstoppable!

Linda

P.S.  Ask me about the Unapologetically Successful (and Sensitive) Mastermind Group, which will help you as you make the decision to take your power back and to stop being ignored or overlooked.

Seeing things differently… Isn’t it interesting how sometimes we can only see a situation from one perspective – one that doesn’t feel good? I’ve had a couple of examples over the last week where I had been seeing things a particular way for several years. It didn’t feel good and I had been trying everything I could think of to do things differently, work around the problem, or even feel better about the problem.

Eventually, I got tired of hearing my inner voice complain about what I didn’t like and I decided to open myself up to new solutions. In both situations I found I was able to have a complete shift in perspective and see things in a very different way.  These insights seemed impossible for me to see before.

How did I get there? I think the thing that helped the most was surrendering. I decided to let go of my expectations about how things should be and what should happen. Once I did that it was as if the blinders had been removed and I could see things differently.

It all seems very obvious now, and it’s hard to understand how I couldn’t see things this way before. In the work that I do I help people shift their perspective and let go all the time, but seeing your own stuff is much more difficult and takes a lot longer.

It’s a great example of how attachment to expectations can stop you seeing what’s right in front of you.

Action Step: Think of a situation you’ve been struggling with. Ask yourself if you can let go of your expectations around what should happen and how things should be. If you are willing, just let it all go and see what happens.

Let this Unstoppable Affirmation support you on your journey:
I am willing to let go of my expectations and I now open myself up to the highest and best possible solutions in all areas.

Be Unstoppable!

Linda

Where is your attention going? My husband and I were on vacation recently in British Columbia. While we were visiting Butchart Gardens in Victoria, we witnessed something that’s become all too common lately:

A woman was busy taking photos. She stepped backwards as she was lining up her shot and fell back into a pond. Fortunately, she was not injured – she was just very wet and extremely embarrassed, and she may have ruined her expensive camera. But how often have we heard lately of people falling to their deaths as they attempt to take the perfect picture?

I’ve also observed people walking along looking at their phones, often with headsets on as well. They cross the road without looking, walk in front of cars or even trains. It seems as though people are becoming less aware of what’s going on and not paying attention.

It was a good reminder to me of the importance of paying attention, because when you’re not paying attention in one area of your life, chances are you’re not paying attention in other areas.

How do you know if you’re putting your attention on the right things? By the experiences you’re having. Sometimes it’s more obvious than others – like falling backwards into a pond!

Something like that may seem like an isolated incident, but often it isn’t. When accidents happen, you keep misplacing things, or perhaps it’s just that annoying things keep happening – perhaps it’s time to stop and ask yourself what you need to pay attention to.

Action Step: For the next week, try asking yourself each morning before you start your day: What is the most important thing for me to know and pay attention to today? Notice what happens as a result.

Let this Unstoppable Affirmation support you on your journey:

I am willing to release all distractions and focus on what is most important to me and for me. I pay attention to the experiences I’m having.

Be Unstoppable!

Linda

When you need validation – I saw this post on Facebook recently and thought it would make a great Unstoppable Energy Tip:

“If outside validation is your only source of nourishment you will hunger for the rest of your life.”

If you need validation and acceptance, you must give it to yourself.  I found that as soon as I stopped needing approval and recognition from others, that’s when I started receiving it.

Action Step: Become aware of when and how you look for validation from someone else. Can you acknowledge yourself instead of needing it from that person/those people?

Let this Unstoppable Affirmation support you on your journey:

I release the need for validation or approval from anyone. The only approval I need is my own.

Be Unstoppable!

Linda