Losing yourself… Have you ever found yourself hating something that you used to love? A conversation I had this week brought up this question and I thought I’d write about it because it happens often.

What tends to happen is that you begin doing something because you love it. You bring your own unique creativity to it and it’s enjoyable. But after some time you find that you’re not enjoying it any more. It’s become a chore – but something makes you feel that you have to continue doing it. Perhaps eventually you come to hate it so much that you have to walk away.

What happened? I think what often happens is that for a variety of reasons (such as other people’s expectations, the need to make money, or traditional beliefs about the way it ‘should’ be done) you can end up losing sight of what you loved about it in the beginning.

It’s like building a box around yourself by feeling you have to conform to expectations. This can lead to hating something that you initially loved because you’ve lost that uniqueness you brought to it in the beginning.

It’s so easy to get pulled into what others say you should do. It’s so easy to be influenced by others, comparing yourself to others and finding yourself wanting. This is how you lose yourself.

I have found this is particularly true for those who are highly sensitive because HSP’s tend to approach things in a different way from most other people and what makes sense and feels good to them may not feel right to others.

What if you didn’t have to conform? What if your uniqueness is exactly what’s needed? Other people may tell you that you can’t do something in the way that feels right to you, but how can they know? Instead of assuming they must be right consider trusting yourself and re-connecting with what feels right to you.

Action Step: If you’ve lost all sense of enjoyment with something that you used to love, and you feel you’ve lost some important aspect of who you really are, ask yourself why you wanted to do it in the beginning. See if you can reconnect with what drew you to it and why it felt good to you at first. Once you’ve re-connected, ask yourself what changes you might make now to ensure you maintain that connection and not allow yourself to be pulled into other people’s expectations.

Let this Unstoppable Affirmation support you on your journey:

I give myself permission to re-connect with what feels right for me and to do things my way. I release the need to lose myself in other people’s expectations.

Be Unstoppable!

I saw this on Facebook recently and thought it would be good to share. Are you up for the challenge?

Action Step: Do at least one of these each day.

Let this Unstoppable Affirmation support you on your journey:

I value myself and make self-care a priority every day.

Be Unstoppable!

Linda

Easy and enjoyable… I used to say that if there was a difficult way to do something, I would find it. Not only that, but I would master it. Would you believe that when I learned to swim I learned to swim underwater first before swimming on top of the water? Don’t ask me why, I have no idea, but my dad (who taught me to swim) will confirm this. He was completely baffled by it.

The one thing I will say about doing things the hard way is that when I finally do accomplish whatever it is, I am fully aware of all the potential obstacles and difficulties and therefore, I can show someone else the best way to do it!

The problem with this approach is that it’s exhausting, it takes so much longer, and it’s not much fun. Oh, and I’ve discovered it’s also unnecessary.

Several years ago I finally learned an important lesson, which is that I can choose a different and much more enjoyable way. All I had to do was choose to do things differently.

Whenever I found myself becoming stressed or overwhelmed by something I asked myself “what is the easiest and most enjoyable way to do this?” And guess what, I started finding the easiest and most enjoyable way to do things. It really can be that simple.

This does not take away anything from the end result, in fact I’ve found that the end result is much better, because the energy I’m putting into whatever I’m doing is much better – there’s no struggle.

Action Step: If you’re struggling with something and would like to give this a try, just start asking yourself: “what’s the easiest, most effective and enjoyable way to do this?” Don’t become stressed if the answer doesn’t come right away, just keep asking the question and you’ll eventually experience a shift.

Let this Unstoppable Affirmation support you on your journey:

I am willing to allow more joy and ease into my life. I release the need or desire for struggle.

Be Unstoppable!

Linda

How to recharge… What do you do when the battery on your phone is low? Or the battery on your laptop? You recharge it of course.

Now, what do you do when your energy is low – and your batteries need to be re-charged? If you’re like many people, the answer is: you keep going and try to force yourself to do more!

I was reminded of this during a conversation I had yesterday and I thought this was a great example to share.

Your phone’s battery needs time to recharge, and so do you. Yet somehow we seem to have developed this belief that it’s not okay to be tired, or to slow down, or take time for ourselves. Or if we do, then we feel guilty.

Next time you’re feeling exhausted or overwhelmed, remind yourself that you need to recharge. Unfortunately, you don’t come with a cable to plug in, so you have to find ways that work for you. The main thing is to allow yourself to do so without feeling guilty or ashamed.

Those times when you have the most to do and think you absolutely cannot stop are probably the times when you need to recharge the most.

It doesn’t have to take long to boost your energy levels again. Sometimes, a simple 10 minute walk outside can do it, or a soak in a hot bath, or a shower. Or perhaps 20 minutes of yoga, meditation or music.

Sometimes it means saying no to something, or asking for help and allowing others to provide it. Or it could be letting other people do things for you, rather than feeling you have to do everything yourself.

There will always be challenges. There is always a lot to do. Remember to take the time to recharge yourself just like you would your phone.

Action Step: think of your 5 favorite ways to re-energize and re-vitalize yourself. Make sure to incorporate at least one of these into your day – every day.

Let this Unstoppable Question support you on your journey (ask it daily):

What can I do to take care of myself and to feel good today?

Be Unstoppable!

Linda
P.S. Nothing affects your energy like your home - when the energy in your home is balanced and harmonious, life flows more easily and you feel much better. Learn how to create positive energy in your home with the Feng Shui Success Course.

When it’s only temporary… What happens when you do something that’s supposed to be temporary, but you find you’re still there several years later?

I received a question from someone last week that reminded me of this, so I thought I’d make it the focus of this week’s tip. I’ve had this experience and I know many others have too.

For example, I’ve worked with people who moved into an apartment or home that was supposed to be temporary – that was 5 or 6 years ago. Also with people who took a job that they didn’t particularly want and don’t love, because they didn’t plan on being there very long. One person I know was in this situation for over 10 years.

What can you do when you really want to move on but you feel trapped?

From my experience people stay stuck where they are because they are resisting it. The key is to accept and make the most of where you are, while at the same time putting some energy towards where you want to be.

When someone moves into an apartment thinking it’s only going to be for about a year, usually they put things in storage, leave things in boxes, and don’t fully move into their space because it’s only supposed to be temporary.

Whenever I worked with someone in this position I encouraged them to unpack the boxes, hang pictures on the walls, and make it feel like home. This will actually help you move on faster than if you leave everything packed. It may seem counter-intuitive – why would you unpack everything if you don’t plan on being there long? But keeping everything packed keeps you in a holding pattern. You are not embracing where you are. You are resisting it and that can keep you stuck.

It’s the same in any other situation. If you have the attitude that you don’t want to be there and only want to move on to something else it’s likely you’ll be there longer than you planned. Instead, do your best to embrace the position and feel as good as you can there. You can still be thinking about, and putting energy into finding the thing that you REALLY want to do, but the energy behind it will be more of: “I accept that this is where I am now and I do my best to embrace it as I also put energy towards what I really want,” instead of “I don’t want to be here, I don’t like it, I want to move on as quickly as possible.”

The energy of acceptance and appreciation will move you forward faster than the energy of resistance and resentment.

Action Step: If there is a situation you want to move out of, but are finding it difficult think about how you could make the most of it and appreciate it now, while still putting some energy towards what you want. Think of it in the same way as “unpacking the boxes” and allowing yourself to feel good about where you are SO THAT you can move on to where you want to be.

Let this Unstoppable Affirmation support you on your journey:

I allow myself to feel good about where I am, and know that the better I feel, the more progress I will make. The better I feel, the better it gets.

Be Unstoppable!

Linda

 Connecting with your home… So many people responded telling me they were interested in learning about the energy of their home with the Feng Shui Success course, so I thought you might enjoy some energy tips on this topic.

When I worked as a Feng Shui practitioner, the first thing I had to do on a consultation was to connect with the client’s home to see what the energy of the home was showing me about them.

My main goal was to help clients understand their home on a different level – and to show them how to make energy changes that would make a difference.

The starting point was always to ask them a few questions that would tell me (and them) more about the house and how it was supporting them (or not).

Here is one question for you to think about regarding your own home:

• What do you know about the history of your home? Things like: who lived there before? Why did they leave? What condition did they leave the home in? What is the energy of your neighbors and the neighborhood like? If your home is new, what is the history of the land it’s built on?

This question helps you understand and connect with your home on a deeper level and often provides valuable and helpful information. For example, it’s possible to come across a home where everyone who has lived there experienced financial problems, or health issues or suffered a relationship breakup. Certain features in homes can energetically create these problems for the people who live there. So you would want to know how to correct that.

Action Step: If you would like to understand the energy of your home and how it’s affecting you, begin by asking yourself this question and see what you can learn from the answers. If you have lived in your home for many years, it may not be as relevant, but it's still a good question to think about.

“We shape our dwellings, and afterwards our dwellings shape us.” – Sir Winston Churchill

Be Unstoppable

Linda

P.S. CLICK HERE to learn more about the Feng Shui Success Program where you will learn everything you need to know about your home, and how to create a healthy, balanced, and supportive environment.

The need for connection… This topic has been on my mind lately because many people I talk to share that they experience difficulty finding people they can connect with in a meaningful way. It’s also often a real challenge for those who are highly sensitive, and introverts in particular.

I came across an article recently from Mindwise that sums up the need for connection very well:

“Human beings are inherently social creatures. As far back as we can trace, humans have traveled, hunted, and thrived in social groups and for good reason. Humans who were separated from their tribe often suffered severe consequences. Social groups provide us with an important part of our identity, and more than that, they teach us a set of skills that help us to live our lives. Feeling socially connected, especially in an increasingly isolated world, is more important than ever. The benefits of social connectedness shouldn’t be overlooked.”

One of the things I like about technology and the internet is that it enables us to connect with people outside our immediate geographical area and with people we don’t necessarily know. For example, I can connect with you by sending out these weekly tips. But it also means that connections may be superficial and it can be difficult to get to know people well.

Action Step: Acknowledge your connections with the people around you. Make sure you surround yourself with people who value and support you.

Let this quote from Brené Brown support you on your journey.

“I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.” – Brené Brown

Be Unstoppable!

Linda

P.S. If you'd like to connect with me for a complimentary Breakthrough Session via Zoom, contact me and let me know your country/time zone. I'll send some days/times for you to choose from for our session.

When you feel overwhelmed… it’s so easy to feel powerless and it’s difficult to see a way out.

You can have so many things on your mind that you feel like one more thing will tip you over the edge.

It’s a horrible feeling, and it’s one that can creep up on you.

When this happens you might think you need to do things like: learn how to manage your time more effectively, prioritize things more efficiently or just get more done. These are all external solutions and they don’t always work.

Of course, there are effective stress management and mindfulness techniques that can help you, and they are worth exploring. But if you’re looking for more permanent solutions, here are some things to consider.

I have found that at times like this the best things to do often seem like the hardest things to do, but in my experience they are the most effective. These are not typically things that you will hear anyone talk about:

1. First, you’ll want to know why you’re feeling overwhelmed. Is it because you have too much to do? Or because you feel stuck with something and don’t know what to do to change it, because nothing you have tried seems to work.
   
   
2. If you have too much to do, the first step is to identify what’s most important to you and make the decision that you will let go of what doesn’t serve you.
   
   
3. For those who are highly sensitive, it’s easy to become hooked in to the energy of other people – those who are around you, and also collective energy. This makes it really difficult to change anything because what you’re trying to change is not yours. The harder you try to change it, the more stuck you will feel. It’s important to recognize this and make the decision to disconnect from any of this energy that is not serving you.
   
   
4. Embrace the concept of letting go. It’s one of the most powerful things you can do. Let go of the need to be always busy. Let go of the need to be always ‘doing.’ Let go of needing to know the answers. Let go of trying to figure everything out. Let go of feeling responsible for everyone.  I know this is one of the hardest things to do, but when you are able to do it, you’ll be amazed at how much better you feel, and how you open yourself up to creative solutions and much better things.
   

Put more focus on how you feel, rather than what you need to accomplish. The interesting thing is that when you do this, you will actually accomplish more.

Action Step: Consider at least one of the above suggestions and focus on that. Notice what changes for you.

Let this Unstoppable Affirmation support you on your journey:

I now choose to release all feelings of overwhelm and allow time for self-care. I am calm and centered in all situations.

Be Unstoppable!

Linda

P.S. By popular request I’m offering the Feng Shui Success Program again. If you’d like to learn more about the energy in your environment and how it affects you, CLICK HERE. Changing the energy in your environment can certainly help you when you feel overwhelmed.

Are you listening? Or perhaps the better question might be – which voice are you listening to?

Are you listening to the inner voice that tells you how much you have in your life to appreciate and guides you to do what’s best for you? Or are you listening to the inner voice that tells you you’re not good enough and you should be doing more? Or the one that tells you of all the bad things that might happen if you reach for too much success?

Or perhaps you’re listening to people around you who tell you what you should or shouldn’t be doing. Or those who want you to see things only from their perspective and be just like them. Or those who want to sell you the solution to all your problems.

You have probably experienced that inner voice that guides you and points you in the right direction. You know that when you listen to it things tend to work out well, and when you don’t – well, things don’t work out so well.

It’s easy for that inner guiding voice (the one that’s good for you) to be drowned out by all the other voices. You may feel you’ve lost your connection to it because there are so many other things competing for your attention. How do you re-connect with it?

I think we have to be constantly aware of staying connected to ourselves. To notice when our REAL voice is being drowned out and to be willing to let go and disconnect form all those other voices and messages. It takes practice – because those other voices can be very persistent and insistent.

Action Step: Choose at least one method that helps you slow down and connect with YOUR supportive inner voice, that gives you time to listen to it and do it daily. Here are some ideas:

• Journaling
  
• Meditation
• Walking (without headphones)
• Yoga, Tai Chi or something similar
• Quiet time (especially in nature)
  

Let this Unstoppable Affirmation support you on your journey:

I have faith in my inner voice and I pay attention to it daily.

Does this resonate with you? How do you make sure you listen to your supportive inner voice? Submit a comment and tell me about it.

Be Unstoppable!

Linda

Just because you can… How often do you find yourself doing things you don’t really want to be doing but you said yes to it because you CAN do it? You may find yourself in a situation that’s difficult to leave because you’ll feel guilty if you do.

I’ve done that many times. So many in fact that one of my favorite messages now is “just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.” I say this to myself and I recommend it to my clients.

You are probably capable of doing many things. Some of them you enjoy, and some of them you might not enjoy. Sometimes you may be asked to do something which you can do, perhaps even easily. It may even sound exciting at first, but if you really think about it, it’s not something that you WANT to do. But you say yes anyway, just because you can do it and because someone asked you or you were presented with the opportunity.

I work with so many people who are feeling overwhelmed with all the things they’ve taken on. We seem to have been conditioned to believe that we should say yes to anything that we have the ability to do. But that road leads to stress, overwhelm and extreme frustration as you feel trapped in situations that are difficult to leave.

If you’re highly sensitive or an empath, it can be particularly difficult because you overthink the situation. I call this mental gymnastics, as you think about every possible outcome, everyone’s feelings, possible conversations, etc. The way through this is to focus on how you FEEL about what you’re considering. Would committing to doing this feel joyful? Would it feel good to do? Is it something you want to have in your experience?

Action Step: Next time an opportunity comes your way or you’re asked to do something, give yourself time to think about it. Check in with yourself to see if it’s something you really WANT to invest your time and energy into.

Let this Unstoppable Affirmation support you on your journey:

“Just because I can do something, it doesn’t mean I should. I am free to choose what’s right for me.”

Does this resonate with you? Do you have a story to share? Tell me about it in the comments, or send me an email directly. I always love to hear from you.

Be Unstoppable!

Linda